All I want is a future where we can truly celebrate that our parents, our friends and, eventually, ourselves had not only a good life, but a good death.
This is my story of three undignified deaths, from my submission to the Select Committee.
This is my submission to the Parliamentary Health Select Committee, currently considering a petition to change the law in New Zealand to support ‘physician assisted suicide’, or, as I prefer to term it, giving people choices at the end of their lives.
This is a personal story – please do not read it if you think you may be upset or offended. It is my view, and only my view, of three undignified deaths in my close family in recent years. To other family members – I truly recognise that your experiences of these deaths are different from mine, and that you may feel that these are not my stories to tell. Everyone involved has their own perspective – this is mine, respecting that you almost certainly have a different view, and irrespective of that, mostly importantly, celebrating that we all, each one of us, cared very deeply.
So here is my plea to the legislators – exhorting them to lead, not follow, to a better more compassionate society.
Six months ago my mother died from cancer of the ovaries after it spread excessively. She was most likely given a de-facto euthanasia at the hospice. The death was not as comfortable or dignified as it could have been. There was no warning as to the onset as she did not have pain and was at stage 4 before she knew anything about it. Basically a drug called oxycodone was used as a pain relief then it stupefied her into a "raving looney" then she went into a stage of an unknown low level of consciousness before laboured breathing and then dying. All of this was over the space of about 12 hours. She was not able to continue on with life as her ovaries were extremely large, she could not move about, she lost her dignity over toileting and finally the pain was such that it was humane to do what was done. Generally a dog at the vet has a more dignified ending than a person does. The Hospice people did the job as best they could however they should be allowed, by law, to he honest about it.